growintolife One of my values is Community, which also links to connection.
Connection is one of the Five Ways to Wellbeing, not just any connection but meaningful, quality connections.
In life, this messy thing called life, we encounter so many connections.
Some of them are incredible blessings, that uplift our day.
Others are fairly efficient, emotion-free and transactional.
And then there are a slice of connections that have the potential to be manipulative, painful, toxic, unhealthy and even soul destroying….
For us to look after ourselves, and potentially look after those in our lives that are entrusted to us, like our children or members of the family or friendship network that we are linked to, noticing when others are in unhealthy relationships is also important.
Protecting ourselves, or them, from the risk of getting drawn in to an unhealthy relationship can feel so important once we understand the consequences and the slippery slope of how it can impact wellbeing, mental health, work and personal life too.
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Even as I think about the idea of protecting someone from the “risk of an unhealthy relationship”, it makes me think of that line between smothering and nurturing that we tread when we are looking out for others in our lives, how, even when we are doing our best to be nurturing, others might view it as smothering.
Knowing how to be present, show care, show wisdom and advice from a position of kindness and support that is available, but also where the receiver has permission to not receive – is also key.
Developing the skills to notice what’s not going right is key, to deciding what to do next.
Spotting those red flags. 
Building awareness, and then finding the strength or clarity around choosing next steps.
Which elements of the signs of a toxic relationship make up the core of your lived experience?
What did you do next?
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I’m going to share some tools in future posts including a framework, that can be truly empowering when navigating relationships of any kind.
In the context of toxic relationships, it can provide you with a fresh perspective and steady confidence.
Remember knowledge is power.
If you can’t wait for my next posts, feel free to investigate transactional analysis on YouTube. 
Did you know that toxic relationships can also exist in the business world? Of course!
Giving yourself permission to cut free from toxic relationships and toxic connections, in whatever setting where we find them is life changing.
At the same time I am going to throw in here, that giving yourself permission to change in ways that build your well-being is also a choice, and it can have a knock on effect regarding the toxic relationships that might be in your life. When we give ourselves permission to be the best person that we feel drawn to be.
Sometimes it unlocks a new chapter within our relationships and unbalances habitual styles of communication that have been the norm between yourself and certain people, up until now, when we start calmly taking charge of our time and space and energy. 
Try to notice your energy drains – who drains your energy, and who fills you up, fills your spirit, fills your joy bucket, as all the good things that you want to be filling, or as many of them as they can naturally.
No one wants forced and false positivity, do we?
